How true is this quote?! I've had the recent experience of having a change in my church volunteer service assignment (or church "calling" in LDS lingo). I was teaching the teenage girls, ages 12-13, at church and have now been asked to teach the adults in Sunday School instead. Apparently the "third time's the charm" rule holds true. I just finished my third round of working with that specific youth age group and am now returning for the third time to teach the adult Sunday School class. As I look back, I can only see how far I've come, and for everyone's sake, I am so grateful. Let's take a look down memory lane, shall we? The same holds true for both church assignments.
Round 1:
Newly wed. Terrified and feeling horribly incapable. A good dose of wobbly knees and shaky utterances that I am too mortified to even want to remember in great detail. I may have even made myself so sick with nerves that occassionaly I had to get a substitute or call in "sick." It was pretty ugly. Let's not dig that far back.
Round 2:
More confident, but still asking God, "Seriously? Do you think this is funny? I"m not laughing." But instead of being so nervous that I would have rather wished a sudden death, I trustingly took the assignment head on and breathed a sigh of relief as each class time came to a close. Not nearly as traumatic, but still cursing myself for feeling so ill at ease at being in front of a group and leading a discussion and hating that my emotions would find themselves rising to the surface. Where's the dignity, I ask you?
Round 3:
Finding myself excited. Brainstorming all kinds of different teaching approaches. Thanking Heavenly Father for another opportunity to share what is dear to me in hopes that it will lift someone else's spirit and strengthen their testimony and understanding. Could it be? Yes! I LOVE teaching and look forward to the challenge. Third time's the charm and I can't believe how much I've changed and how far I've come.
Looking back isn't necessarily a bad thing as long as what you're doing is taking stock of just how far you've come. For me, looking back, I can see this miraculous change. It may have taken almost 40 years, but in the manner that the Colorado River changes the Arizona landscape subtely, I too have been changed by a slow, but constant force. Change is good.
Here are a few thoughts that have come to mind as I look at how change takes place in our lives.
1. As I eluded to with my little shout out to my Arizona roots, the most significant changes come slow and steady. As much as I love the ocean, its flash in the pan attempts at changing a beach or coast line with its high and low tides, has got nothing on the almost imperceptible, but staggering changes to the landscape that a river like the Colorado can have over time.
Slow and steady, but consistent changes will produce the long-lasting changes that we desire.
2. Feel the fear and do it anyways. Yes, a short tribute to that now decades old self-help movement. If you keep waiting until you feel "ready" to do anything, nothing will ever happen. Change is scary which is why we so often find ourselves feeling stuck. It's natural for us to want to stay comfortable and familiar. We humans are so drawn to this kind of comfort that we'll put up with all kinds of horrors and nonsense just to avoid the feelings of disonnance that come from doing something out of our norm.
Feel the fear and do it anyway. You'll be surprised at just how much your self-worth will skyrocket by doing this one thing.
3. Don't be afraid of the word "repentance." Yup. I'm sneaking in the spiritual stuff. Like many of you, as a kid (teenager and young adult) that word instilled in me feelings of fear, guilt, and shame. I had a hate-hate relationship with it because I didn't understand it. All I could see was that it was a call to admit my many, many faults and weaknesses. It felt like a sharp reminder that I had disappointed someone once again. It isn't that at all. From now on, when you read the word "repent" or "repentance," replace it with the word "change" and your perpsective on just what we're being asked to do by our Father will turn from feeling like a dismall and miserable "have to" to a bright-eyed and excited "get to."
Here, let's give it a try:
(
Helaman 4:15) And it came to pass that they did repent (CHANGE), and inasmuch as they did repent (CHANGE) they did begin to prosper.
Or this one.
(
Revelations 3:19) As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and
repent(CHANGE).
See? Change is good! So, what have you been wanting to do or try? What quirk or personality issue do you have that you'd like to master and look back upon to see change? What plan do you have in place to make positive changes in your life and are you implementing that plan?
I remember telling a dear friend after a church meeting sometime ago, that I felt like I was in a rut. The problem was that I wasn't doing anything about it. In came life to the rescue, as it often does, and created change for me since I wasn't quite sure what to do about it myself. The last 5 years have been a time of compressed learning and growth.
This weekend there's a wonderful opportunity to get some extra guidance for change and life improvement. For those of you unfamiliar with the happenings of the
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, this is our semi-annual
General Conference weekend. Over the course of two days, Church leaders from around the world gather to share inspired messages to the world-wide LDS membership. Among those speakers will be modern-day
prophets and apostles. It's an opportunity to feel an outpouring of spiritual guidance like no other.
The bishop of our congregation issued a challenge last fall as well as this past week to go to conference (whether it's in person, t.v., streamed via internet, etc.) prepared with questions in mind that we felt that we needed help answering or solving. He witnessed that if we did so, we would find answers among the messages given, whether through the direct words of the talks or spiritual promptings that would come as we focus while watching the conference.
I have taken this challenge in the past and have had prayers answered and direction given specific to my circumstances. This past fall was case in point as we were just beginning to face our difficult journey with our son, his schooling, and his emotional needs. It was from preparing through prayer and fasting over that Conference weekend in October that I received confirmation that we needed to take the course that we have taken these past 6 months.
It was that clear direction that sustained me during some very rough, ROUGH days of delving into everything from mental health assessments to standing up to public school administration policies that did not have my son's best interest at heart. I absolutely could NOT have done all that I have since October had I not had that peace and knowledge that came directly from my Father in Heaven. And I can thank taking that challenge of watching General Conference with a believing and prepared heart and mind. I also give full credit to the spiritual nudging that came over those two days that I needed to start blogging and here I am, still at it almost 6 months later.
Yes, I'm going in with another set of questions, concerns, and problems to solve as I watch Conference this weekend. I can't wait to see what comes next. I'm ready for whatever new change needs to happen! If you want to have your own experience with this, I invite you to watch, read, and listen to all of the sessions that will be recorded
here.
Off on another adventure!
~Arianna
